Sunday, October 26, 2008

housewifey duties

This weekend I think I might have caught the domesticus virus.  On Friday afternoon a dear friend called and asked that I provide the cake type item for her husband's birthday party the following evening.  I started to brainstorm right away about what could be done.  Said husband LOVES my pumpkin bread.  He begs for it each year as the holidays roll around - sometimes as early as when the first leaves turn.  So, I knew I had better do a pumpkin thing.  After careful consultation with my sister and mom (fellow bakers of this same fantastic recipe from my grandma) on Saturday morning, I was set.  I headed for the grocery to get my supplies.  

All afternoon, along with pumpkin cake preparations (with cream cheese frosting and chocolate chips - YUMMM), I also did laundry, paid my bills, talked with family and friends (I love that I have rediscovered my hands-free gizmo for my phone), and copious amounts of wedding planning/daydreaming/thinking about the future.  The cake came out fantastic, the birthday boy and guests gave it serious raves, and I was pleased as punch.  I was so satisfied with myself having taken care of all my housewifey duties.  In fact, as my head hit the pillow I felt accomplished.  

This is not a feeling I have a lot lately.  Though the fit of my new job is growing on me, generally fitting better, there are many days when I still come home feeling defeated or overwhelmed (especially when I have to write 10 page theological papers - like this week, yikes).  Wedding planning is frustrating at times - for example, we STILL haven't found a reception venue(!!!!).  The downturn of the economy and general insanity of the housing market has made D and I feel very small and vulnerable in the process of planning our future housing.  Last but certainly not least, in order to save money, I am moving into D's condo at the end of November.  It will be great to finally live in one place, but it means that I will have 90% of my belongings in storage and have to say goodbye to my lovely house.  (this last one is making me sadder that all the above combined right now. sniff, SNIFF.)  So, well, feeling accomplishment was a BIG DEAL to me on Saturday.  

This feeling got me to thinking...  I am as much of a feminist as a romantic, idealistic, athletic, vegetarian, clergyperson, graduate of a women's college, firstborn daughter of midwestern(ish) parents can be.  And that's pretty feminist, without going over the top - as in, there's no way I'm a separatist, I'll be taking my husbands name, and I'm more of an idealist than anything.  

On Saturday, I think there began in my spirit a curious transformation.  I still bristle at the idea that I would be the ONLY one doing the housekeeping but I am falling in love with the idea of staying home to raise the kiddos.  (prayer break:  PLEASE God let us be blessed with kiddos.  Amen.)  I never thought that would be me.  I thought I'd have a little time at home and then be back to work gradually.  I thought I'd need the work outside my home, mommy, wife, life in order to stay balanced in my self, my sense of call, and my sense of myself.  But right now, I am all about home.  It is pure delight to imagine creative projects, long walks, the day to day of watching children grow, and putting care into the marriage that I hope to have, taking care of the one I am about to promise to create my life with.  Somehow, at least since Saturday, it is the housewifey duties that I am longing for.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

the noble marmot

For my birthday, D gave me a super cool jacket from a company called Marmot Mountainworks.  We've been joking as we get ready to go out, "Grab that varmint and let's go."  or  "How's your marmot today?"  or  "Is that a squirrel jacket?"  This has led to a lot of wondering about marmots.  What are they anyway?  Are they squirrels?  Rodents?  So last night we finally couldn't take the curiosity anymore.  We looked them up online.  A few clicks later we found a world we could never have anticipated, let alone imagined.  I don't know how to post pictures from other websites on my blog (I'm still quite the rookie blogger), but I do know how to write out a link to a site.  Go check out: www.marmotburrow.ucla.edu.  You won't be sorry.  This was the most entertaining - and informative! - surf on the internet I've had in a great long while.  We laughed out loud.  You'll laugh, you'll cry... and who knows, maybe YOU will be inspired to participate in advancing marmot research or protecting the endangered Vancouver Island marmot.  Maybe you will want to be a part of the next International Marmot Meeting.  The noble, charismatic marmot - check it out!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

the power of prayer

What a difference a week makes.  Last week I was fretting and unproductive.  I needed to focus and get a few things done.  The wedding planning had hardly been even begun, the dress was not yet selected, and I was totally stuck and frozen.  Overwhelm is my weakest link.  When there is too much on the plate I tend to shut down.  So I stopped and considered my options.... we could delay the wedding date a little further out.  I could quit my job.  We could win the lotto and so then we could hire someone to do everything (and fast!) and we could stop worrying about housing.  OR, I could set a few attainable goals and pick away at them.  As it turns out, nothing was really as hard as it initially seemed.  More importantly, progress has been made!  I called some venues, we visited, and now we are narrowing in on dates, places and times.  I bravely made another appointment and employed my fantastic friend to accompany me to the bridal boutique (this is where the prayer comes in).  Through the power of the prayer warriors who were praying for our success and the Lord's good grace in answering those fervent prayers, we found the perfect dress!  All is well in brideville tonight.  No one is quitting or despairing or putting things off.  Phew!